Katie
can read minds, but is illiterate.
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Lucy
What happens if I type here?
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Alex
Women: Can't live with them, can't kill them.
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Tim
Weed smoking and turkey pulling today. Oops ... reverse those verbs. Sorry.
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Simon
was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said "Parking Fine"
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Craig
Build a man a fire he's warm for a day, set a man on fire and he's warm the rest of his life.
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Callum
negative candles are cantdles
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Lauren
this space for rent
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Jade
Top Tip Of The Week: When going through airport customs and you are asked "do you have any firearms with you?" do not reply "what do you need?"
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Ben
do you know what really makes me smile? Facial muscles
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Sophie
got her test results back this morning and is shocked to find that she been diagnosed with OCD. I've rung the doctors nine times to check if they're correct
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Lucy
is normally not a praying person, but if you're up there, please save me Superman
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Elliot
is cleaning out his medicine cabinet of expired prescriptions with a glass of water and several mystery pills at a time
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Joe
is proud of himself. She finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
Alex
what do we want? PROCRASTINATION! When do we want it?... Next week
1 year ago under Funny/ Witty
